By Dr. Diane Lass

Did you know that the physiological responses to anxiety/fear and excitement are the same? The difference is how we label our physiological responses. When you are feeling anxious, check yourself. Could you really be feeling excited with a little nervousness mixed in? I remember testifying in court as an expert witness for domestic violence. I didn’t know anything about the case, I testified as an expert on domestic violence relationships dynamics in general such as why victims would stay with their abusers. I would sit in the hallway waiting for the attorney to call me to the witness stand. The only thing I knew about the case was that one of the attorneys were going to attack my credibility or try to discredit me in some way. Which was kind of the fun part really, although I took my job very seriously and I always wanted to do my best. I would often feel anxious as I was waiting in the hall to be called to the stand. I would remind myself that anxiety and excitement were the same physiological responses. I would say to myself: “My goodness, I must be really excited!” and invariably I would feel much more relaxed, able to stay in the moment and enjoy the experience.

Do you ever wake up in the middle of the night with something on your mind? Maybe better put, wake up in the middle of the night with something haunting your mind? Whatever the topic is, it often swirls around in our heads until it finds another topic to attach to and before you know it, you are faced with all kinds of emotions: fear, anxiety, worst case scenarios and the idea of falling back to sleep is no longer an option.

I often wake up worrying about something. Worry and I have had an attachment for as long as I can remember. It as though if I worry I am doing something. I am trying to keep my ducks all in a row, even thinking of the path the ducks should take before they get there. Problem is, ducks never stay in a row. There are always those that wander off on their own; there are always outliers. Reality is, worrying does us absolutely no good and most of us already know that. All worry is, is a false sense of control. We think we are doing something, but the facts are, all we are doing is worrying. It doesn’t change anything. I find it helpful to remind myself of this fact during my 3 am worry sessions -when my mind goes on automatic mode and takes on a life of its own and down into that familiar rabbit hole. As we all know, most of what we worry about never play out, which can be a double-edged sword, because if we are thinking three steps ahead and worrying and the situation does not come to pass, well maybe we dodged that bullet by worrying? That’s called negative reinforcement, which sets us up to worry more in the future. One thing that helps me is to remind myself that “all we know, is we don’t know.” I will say it out loud to myself, sometimes it does help!

The thing is, I have had this cognitive switch lately. I don’t wake up worrying. I wake up so excited, I can’t sleep! Ok, I will take excitement over anxiety any day. I am so excited about 2 Thrive Network! As I have mentioned, this has been a dream of mine for a very long time. I visualize workshops, women empowering women, women supporting one another, dreaming together, helping one another not to worry and to explore their passions and their life paths. It feels so exciting to me, I can’t sleep! I came downstairs at 5 am to the same living room that I came to after my husband died in the dark to study for my licensing exams. Then, I was just trying to survive. Today, I came down excited, I am Thriving!  I lit candles and just sat and dreamed. My only problem? I couldn’t figure out why the world was still asleep! I wanted everyone to be up and dreaming with me. So, world, wake up! Time to get excited about your passions. What excites you? Do the things that excite you bring about anxiety? Do you wonder how you could make your dreams, your passions, into reality? Remember, anxiety and excitement are the same physiological responses! 

Thank you for taking this journey with me. I can’t stop thinking of the positive energy at our workshops and meetings together. A community of supportive women, which will inspire and embrace one another to turn their dreams into reality and live a life they love. Too much fun!

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